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How can couples reverse the buildup of resentment once they notice it?

10.06.2025 03:34

How can couples reverse the buildup of resentment once they notice it?

By giving up the notion that someone has to “win” or that anyone loses by saying “you are right”, “I am sorry”, or “I can do better.”

By keeping in mind it’s OK to have different opinions and different experiences, and they both matter in equal measure.

By taking turns talking.

It seems that I am cursed with bad luck. How do I break such a curse?

By internalizing that responding with kindness is strength, not weakness.

By wanting to truly understand each other, despite feeling unheard.

By deciding to stop with the criticism and the nagging and instead say thank you for everything you do for me. Thank you for loving me.

He led George W. Bush's PEPFAR program to stop AIDS. Now he fears for its future - NPR

By learning to validate what the other is feeling. “I can absolutely see why you feel this way.”

By resolving to listen with curiosity rather than defensiveness.